Ron's Aunt Bernice

New York, New York

Bronistawa (Kaczmarek) Milkowski  (1916-1961)

Born in Bay City, Michigan, four years after the family had emigrated to America, the third

daughter of Jozef and Franciszka Kaczmarek nonetheless inherited the traditional Polish

moniker of "Bronistawa"; but, to everyone, she was always Bernice.  If Bernice's life could

be described in two words, they would be "unfulfilled potential."  Throughout her teens, she

displayed great academic potential; but a tumultuous home life deprived her of an adequate

environment in which to study.  Bernice's mother, after two years of widowhood and with

three small children at home, remarried out of financial desperation.  Her second husband,

Mike Japczyk, a successful entrepreneur, drank excessively.  His loud and often obnoxious

behavior dominated life in the home, and his three children from a previous marriage added

even more confusion to the already cramped quarters.  When Bernice's teachers visited the

home and pleaded with Franciszka to provide a quiet place for Bernice to study, Franciszka

could not understand her daughter's need for privacy.  Depressed and deeply disappointed,

Bernice left home at the age of 14 and joined her older sister, Martha, in New York City.

In New York, Bernice refused to attend school, so Martha helped her obtain a job in the

only line of work she knew: the restaurant business.  After several stints in the kitchen,

however, it became clear that Bernice's real talent lay in entertaining people.  As a young

woman she had very blonde hair, big blue eyes, high cheekbones, and a curvaceous figure.

She also played the harmonica quite well and danced gracefully.  Before long, she found a

niche entertaining sailors on shore liberty in New York . . . and began dating some of them.

Men showered her with gifts, and she never lacked for money.  In her early twenties, she

landed a job with the Grace Line, serving on cruise ships traveling up and down the eastern

coast of the United States, as well as Central and South America.  On board, she cared for

the children of wealthy passengers.  Although she had no children herself, she had a special

way with them, and the parents appreciated it.  In addition to a normal salary, she routinely

received generous tips.  Sadly, money slipped through her fingers too easily, or as her sister,

Virginia, explained, "She blew it all."  Bernice suffered through two unsuccessful marriages;

first to Tony Padovan from New York, and, second, to Joe Milkowski, origins unknown.  Over

the years, Bernice became a heavy drinker.  She died in 1961 from liver failure at age 44.

Source: tape-recorded recollections of Virginia Plummer  (Oct. 28, 1996 and Nov. 1, 1996)